ASSALAMUALAIKUM:)
Hi , so yeah..today's topic is about "do you love you?" . All started with Insecurities. Insecurities is uncertainly or anxiety about oneself or to be easy,lack of confidence.When you feel down or low self esteem for seeing someone else's success, beauty or anything good on them that you wished for your entire lifetime.Not that you feel jealous in a bad way or 'busuk hati', but..you really wish to be that particular person. Well, personally..i always tend to feel insecure for pretty girls out there.Lagi-lagi bila bukak 'explore' in instagram.I tend to see soooooo much pretty girls.I dont really stalk good looking guys..but all i stalk is all those pretty girls and end-up feeling bad about myself and sometimes..i feel like crying and i asked myself.."how could i ever be like those girls?" At the age of 20 now, i still look like a potato where i dont know how to make up like other girls.I dont know how to wear shawl like other girls or be fashionable wearing high heels..classy and fancy clothes dan sekutu dengannya.I JUST DONT. Even to wear a lipstick sometimes i feel uncomfortable and inconfident..so i just wear a lip gloss.I tend to think that people would laugh at me if i try to impress myself so much.Yeahh..Seriously.Anyway..there was this one time..i went for a date with my boyfriend. At first..i felt nothing.I was totally happy and all..until its time for solat Asar and i went to the surau.And as soon as i entered in, my self esteem dropped like from 100% to 0 after seeing soooo much pretty girls in the Surau.How clean and flawless their face are.How skinny they are.How fashionable they are and all i was wearing was just a jeans and a long sleeve shirt.Then..after praying..i looked at myself in the mirror(typical girls thang to betulkan our tudung), i felt so sad for not being the most pretty girl .I felt sorry for my bf for having me as his girl.Then..my day was dull. I cant stop thinking about it even my bf notices it and he kept on asking what he did wrong when actually, i made myself mental brakedown for giving s shit about those stuff .But i didnt tell him the reason why until i arrived home.So, the next date we had..when its time for solat..i was walking towards the surau then my bf came up to me and whispered " nanti masuk dalam surau, kalau nampak perempuan lawa, jangan rasa insecure or sedih..sebab Nadia dah cantik dah" . hahahaha. i never expect he would say such thing and remember about it. It was funny tho. seriously . anyway..thanks Haikal. . thanks for keep on praising me eventhough i still dont believe it until now.hahaha. But sometimes..i could be confident but not to the extend of 100% confident..maybe 75% ..I think..i dont really have to change myself..my look..my style like those girls..just to fit in the situation or just to follow the trend of wearing make up..or wearing shawl(which to me, i look weird wearing it). So, i just be me..wear my tudung bawal as always .Wear shirts and jeans and put my sneakers on.Be real , you dont have to fake yourself because people asked you to or because you wanna be like them when the fact is,you arent comfortable with it. And most import thing, if you ever feel like you're not good enough for someone just because your confident level is low as heck,just chill.If someone wants to be a part in your life,they would accept you for who you are and not that different person you turned yourself into.Get it?Chin up girls, you are pretty enough as god created you perfectly.Conclusion,love yourself as much as you can,because.. i love me . What about you ? DO YOU LOVE YOU ?